Young women especially have something invested in being nice people, and it’s only when you have children that you realise you’re not a nice person at all, but generally a selfish bully.”
Fay Weldon.

In other school business, I missed the whole PTA pick, as I was unfortunately called away to Tokyo on important business, but my friend was there and I have to tell you I am absolutely disgusted with the way things were handled.
Basically, there was an observation class first and the meeting afterwards, apparently the incumbent honchos went up and down the corridor with lists of how many points people had and naming names very loudly and told those people to ‘not even think about going home before the meeting’.
There followed 2 hours of bullying and shaming. ‘ What will your son think about you if you don’t take part in this?’
“ Why should you not have to do it when everyone else has.
No one was exempt, work, sick relatives, single parenthood, no excuses.
One woman said she had to leave to pick up her younger child from a child minder and they said ‘you’re not leaving until this has been decided.’
At the end two of four classes were undecided. There are 5 available ‘positions’ for each class ( = 10) and 15 people between the classes that didn’t have the required points, ( strangely, not including me who doesn’t have a point to her name but ( fortunately) apparently not on any list either.)
Finally it was decided that EVERYONE will have a job, and 3 people were assigned to each job, in theory this should make less work for all concerned but, and I think the other gals in Japan who read this would back me up here, it won’t, somehow it’ll transform into 3 times as much damn work for all.
There is supposed to be zero tolerance for bullying in school, but as we’ve seen, women bullying each other is sanctioned, condoned, expected, teachers bullying students is ignored, it’s just the kids who can’t bully each other.
These are the tactics that enabled China to enforce it’s one child policy.

7 thoughts on “BULLIED!

  1. You know as an outsider sitting back watching this knowing that I will never get bullied like this because 1. I just won’t tolerate it and 2. Getting a free pass whether I want it or not it’s so frustrating to watch. I just want to stand up and scream at these women not to let themselves be treated like that.

  2. My blood is actually boiling on your behalf. How can this be accepted and tolerated as the norm? Does anyone ever give then some lip and walk out? What could they do about it anyway – sack you?

  3. Psychos! All of them. You clearly are not, don’t let it get to you. Happens all the time, and although we are not allowed to have a PTA at all at our school which makes me very sad in some ways (headmaster is afraid of having one in case it becomes a lobby against him, which I strongly suspect might have been the case in a previous job), I completely do NOT miss that kind of wank female behaviour.

    • Gail, one of the worst parts about all this is the so called PTA has zero power, there is no referendum, no challenge to policy, no say in the running of the school or how school funds are spent or anything, these are ‘jobs’ created just to give people something to do. For example, one of the jobs is organising all the ‘mothers’ clubs’, the mothers’ tennis club, volleyball club, flaura and fauna frickin club, if some women want these clubs they can get together and organise them themselves!!

      Marianne, you might be okay, you live in a different type of community, things might be pleasanter down there, ( again with the optimism lol)

      Steve, thank you for your outrage on my behalf.
      No no one says anything, at least not at the time, that is a huge part of the problem, if people just stuck together and colectively refused, the school would be forced to make changes to the system.

      SWK, absolutely, and as we said last night, can you imagine if they told one of US, that ‘no’ we couldn’t pick up our kid??
      I’m already stressing next year when Kev is JHS and they do the ‘take hostages in the gym’ method of getting you. 😦

  4. And you know, politicians are throwing money around trying to get women here to have more kids. Those old men should visit a few PTA meetings and they’ll see a large part of the real problem. If you can endure that crap for just one or two kids it’s a miracle.

  5. Yep…PTA’s can be a nightmere! I can’t beleive they want to put three people in each position. No choice involved? You are right. This is adult bullying!

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